Dirty Talk Examples for Beginners: What to Say and How to Say It

Dirty talk can feel awkward at first, but it is one of the simplest ways to make sex more exciting. You do not need a script or a special voice. You need a few phrases that feel natural to you and a partner who knows you are trying something new.

Start with what you already feel

The easiest dirty talk is simply describing what is happening and how it feels. If you can say “that feels good”, you can do dirty talk. From there, you can make it more specific and more playful.

Beginner-friendly examples

Describing how it feels

• “I love it when you do that.”
• “Don’t stop.”
• “You feel amazing.”

Asking for what you want

• “Slower… just like that.”
• “Touch me here.”
• “Tell me what you want.”

Building anticipation (by text or in person)

• “I keep thinking about last night.”
• “I can’t wait to get you alone later.”
• “Guess what I’m planning for tonight.”

Compliments

• “You look so good right now.”
• “I love how you touch me.”

How to get comfortable

1. Talk about it outside the bedroom. Ask your partner which words they find sexy and which are a turn-off.
2. Start with a whisper. A low, slow voice makes even simple phrases feel intimate.
3. Use texts as practice. Writing first is easier for many people.
4. Turn up the heat gradually. Move from sweet to spicier as you both get comfortable.
5. Laugh if it goes wrong. A shared laugh is intimate too.

Respect and boundaries

Dirty talk works best when both people enjoy it. Agree on words you want to avoid, check in if you try something new, and never use dirty talk to pressure someone.

More dirty talk examples by situation

The easiest way to start is to borrow a sentence and make it your own. Change a word, slow it down, say it in your voice. Here are examples for different moments.

Before you see each other (texts)

• "I can't stop thinking about last night."
• "I have plans for you later. You'll find out what they are."
• "Come home early. I miss your hands."
• "Guess what I'm wearing under this."

During foreplay

• "I love the way you kiss me."
• "Don't stop, that feels amazing."
• "Slower. I want this to last."
• "Tell me what you want me to do next."
• "You have no idea how much I want you right now."

During sex

• "Yes, just like that."
• "You feel incredible."
• "Harder" or "softer", simple instructions are dirty talk too.
• "I love watching you."
• "Don't stop, I'm close."

Afterwards

• "That was exactly what I needed."
• "I loved it when you…"
• "Next time, I want to try…"

Types of dirty talk to experiment with

• Compliments: tell your partner what you find irresistible about them. The safest place to start.
• Describing sensations: say what you feel right now. It is honest, easy and very arousing.
• Requests: ask for what you want. It turns dirty talk into useful feedback.
• Anticipation: describe what you are about to do. Teasing builds desire.
• Fantasies: share a scenario you have imagined. Agree first that sharing a fantasy is not a promise to act it out.
• Role play: for couples who feel confident, a character can make it easier to say bolder things.

Mistakes that make dirty talk awkward

• Copying porn scripts. Over-the-top lines often sound fake. Your own words work better.
• Going too explicit too fast. Build up gradually and watch your partner's reaction.
• Talking non-stop. One sentence at the right moment beats a monologue.
• Ignoring boundaries. Some words turn one person on and another off. Talk about it outside the bedroom.
• Taking a laugh personally. Laughing together is part of intimacy. Smile and try again.

A 7-day practice plan

1. Day 1: say one compliment out loud during a kiss.
2. Day 2: send one flirty text during the day.
3. Day 3: describe one sensation during foreplay.
4. Day 4: ask for one thing you want.
5. Day 5: whisper what you are about to do.
6. Day 6: share a small fantasy, outside the bedroom.
7. Day 7: talk about what you both enjoyed this week.

Your voice matters as much as your words: see our tips on making your voice sexier and sexting.

Learn it step by step

Reading is a start, but technique is easier to learn when you can watch it. The Sexfulness video course Dirty Talk for Beginners walks you through it in short, practical lessons, along with 175+ other lessons on pleasure and intimacy. Get full access →

Frequently asked questions

What should I say during dirty talk as a beginner?
Start by describing how something feels and asking for what you want, such as “don’t stop” or “slower, like that”.

How do I make dirty talk less awkward?
Talk about it beforehand, start with a whisper, use texts as practice and build up gradually.

What if my partner does not like dirty talk?
Respect it. You can still share appreciation with sounds, simple words and touch.

Not sure where to start? Take the free 2-minute Pleasure Quiz and get a personalized plan of lessons matched to your goals.

What are some simple dirty talk phrases for beginners?
Start with descriptions and compliments: "I love that", "Don't stop", "You feel amazing", "I want you". Simple, honest sentences work best.

How do I talk dirty over text?
Build anticipation: tell your partner you are thinking about them, hint at plans for later, and keep it playful. Agree on privacy, as messages can be seen by others.